All this fuss about Harry Kane's role in today's big game against France tends to overlook the fact that he's really obviously the early-1940s Marvel superhero Hurricane in disguise, and thus able to use his super-speed and other godly powers to win the game for us easily if he wants to. If he doesn't, I can only assume it's part of some further ruse to protect his secret identity while fighting fifth-columnists sent by dictator nations. Or alternatively some comedy blundering on the part of his fat, comical sidekick Speedy Scriggles.
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