I do wish they wouldn't give names to the piddling little storms we get in this country. It makes us look like we're trying to be as cool as the places that get hurricanes. And Brian's a silly name anyway, that just makes me think of a Monty Python sketch. But at least it's an improvement on the previous one, which they saw fit to name after my mother. Imagine if I'd been somehow killed by Storm Aileen! I can just see Sigmund Freud watching from the hereafter and saying "See, that's exactly the kind of thing I was always talking about!"
And then my mother would say "It's not even remotely like anything you ever talked about. Stop taking credit for everything involving mothers!" and Sigmund Freud would say "Fair enough, sorry. Want another game of mah-jong, or whatever we do to pass the time in the afterlife?"
And then I'd come along (having, as I said earlier, just been killed somehow by the slightly-stronger-than-usual winds) and say "Are you talking about me?", and Sigmund Freud would say "No, not really. Want to play mah-jong with us?", and I'd say "No, I never really understood that game. I'll go and play badminton with my dad over there," and Sigmund Freud would say "There, see, that's exactly the kind of thing I was always talking about!" and the whole thing would go on in that vein for a long time. It'd get boring very fast, so it's a good thing I wasn't killed by the storm.
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